Boys
Boys boys boys
It's time.
I know we’ve had a long few months without fantasy, and I think our emotions can best be expressed through the words of a drunken Mike at Tmo’s lake shack:
Same Mike, same. But fear no more! Fantasy football is coming SOON to quench the parching thirst that last season left us.
Draft
First things first, the time and place of year’s fantasy draft will be released next week, as well as the draft order. We have been really good in recent years about having 100% participation and maximum shit-talkery, and while no draft will likely ever reach the glory of 2012’s, I think a coordinated effort to get the whole group together to draft and party for the league’s 11th season would be a worthy venture. Tmo could even start us off by chugging his warm beer from the trophy that he “earned”. Maybe not, but a man can dream.
The draft order will be decided in the group message, as is customary. The selection order is as follows:
- Ryan
- Collin
- John Luke
- Nathan
- Mike
- TK
- Austin
- Garrett
- Jake
- Tyler
I’m willing to bet that at least a few of you won’t read this, so of course I’ll say it again in the group message when we decide the order.
Schedules
Each of your team schedules has been updated and set for the season. For whatever reason, the window-lickers at ESPN can’t just keep a rotating schedule year-over-year, but that’s our league format so you will continue playing opponents in the same order as last couple years, starting where you left off in week 14 of last year. Because we’re having 15 weeks of regular season this year, there will be 3 teams you only play once, and those are the teams you face in weeks 7, 8, and 9 (highlighted in light blue). See below for the team schedules.
| Week | Austin | Collin | Garrett | Jake | John Luke |
| 1 | Mike | Ryan | Jake | Garrett | Nathan |
| 2 | TK | Nathan | JL | Tyler | Garrett |
| 3 | Jake | Garrett | Collin | Austin | Tyler |
| 4 | JL | Tyler | Ryan | TK | Austin |
| 5 | Collin | Austin | Nathan | Mike | TK |
| 6 | Ryan | TK | Mike | JL | Jake |
| 7 | Nathan | Jake | Tyler | Collin | Mike |
| 8 | Garrett | JL | Austin | Ryan | Collin |
| 9 | Tyler | Mike | TK | Nathan | Ryan |
| 10 | Mike | Ryan | Jake | Garrett | Nathan |
| 11 | TK | Nathan | JL | Tyler | Garrett |
| 12 | Jake | Garrett | Collin | Austin | Tyler |
| 13 | JL | Tyler | Ryan | TK | Austin |
| 14 | Collin | Austin | Nathan | Mike | TK |
| 15 | Ryan | TK | Mike | JL | Jake |
| Week | Mike | Nathan | Ryan | TK | Tyler |
| 1 | Austin | JL | Collin | Tyler | TK |
| 2 | Ryan | Collin | Mike | Austin | Jake |
| 3 | TK | Ryan | Nathan | Mike | JL |
| 4 | Nathan | Mike | Garrett | Jake | Collin |
| 5 | Jake | Garrett | Tyler | JL | Ryan |
| 6 | Garrett | Tyler | Austin | Collin | Nathan |
| 7 | JL | Austin | TK | Ryan | Garrett |
| 8 | Tyler | TK | Jake | Nathan | Mike |
| 9 | Collin | Jake | JL | Garrett | Austin |
| 10 | Austin | JL | Collin | Tyler | TK |
| 11 | Ryan | Collin | Mike | Austin | Jake |
| 12 | TK | Ryan | Nathan | Mike | JL |
| 13 | Nathan | Mike | Garrett | Jake | Collin |
| 14 | Jake | Garrett | Tyler | JL | Ryan |
| 15 | Garrett | Tyler | Austin | Collin | Nathan |
Cash Money
Unless challenged before the season begins, the current fiscal policy of the league is as follows:
Dues
$50 due per team before the draft = $500 league fund
Payouts
$10 each week for the top points total ($150)
$50 for winning the Money-Back Bowl
$100 for winning 2nd place
$200 for winning 1st place
This is a slight change from last year. With the 14-week season, the extra $10 went to the season leader in points for, but with the introduction of a 15th week I figured it made sense to shift that $10 to the weekly bonuses.
I’m open to changing this, either the dues or the payouts, and any proposed changes can be put to a vote, but I’d like to avoid lowering the stakes because higher stakes = more involvement throughout the season.
Before the draft, pay your dues to John Luke’s venmo (@johnluke999) but hold off paying until we give word in the group chat in case there are changes.
Trophy
As you all may have seen, the league now has a shitty 3D-printed trophy. I think we’re all financially stable enough to agree that we can afford to save a small bit of the $200 winnings after a championship to pay for shipping to the next champion (looking at you this year, Tmo), but if you’re too cheap to do that then by all means let us know so we don’t waste money on you. If someone has a different/better idea for the trophy, bring it up.
Well, that’s it for the July fantasy update. Football is just around the corner, get excited everyone!